Guarding Your Heart: Self Care Like A Boss for Single Women Over 50

Two very different matters of the heart that happen in the month of February.  One is the National Wear Red Day in support for Go Red for Women of the American Heart Association.  Go Red For Women advocates for more research and action for women’s heart health.   Cardiovascular diseases and stroke kills approximately one woman every 80 seconds.  Medically speaking, the heart is a muscular organ that pumps life giving blood to all parts of the human body through the body’s circulatory system of various blood vessels (arteries, veins, and capillaries). This provides the oxygen and nutrients that our bodies need to survive.  So, I think it’s safe to say that the human heart is one of the most important organs we have.

The other heart event in February is Valentine’s Day the day we celebrate love and the people we love be it a girlfriend/boyfriend, spouse, parent, siblings, grandparents, or other family members, friends with or without benefits.  It’s a day we show love.  It can also be a day single woman especially those over 50, find challenging.

Both matters of the heart are equally impactful in the lives of women.  This is because the heart governs the things of the body and the soul.  Scripture says “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life” (NLT).  Guarding our heart is taking care of ourselves physically and spiritually.  I believe our emotions affect our bodies.  We all are aware of how harmful stress is to our health and the importance of managing stress.  One way is creating and maintaining a good self-nurturing routine.

Being a divorced woman over 60 and the daughter of a father who died of heart disease, I practice self-care like a “Boss.”  Although I have a list of things you can do, the goal is to focus on yourself as a person and what brings love, joy and peace into your life.  That means eating healthier but not depriving myself of some of the foods that you enjoy and some type of physical activity.  I have two fantastic granddaughters that I want to be around to enjoy, they are my motivation for living my best life.  Guarding my heart from the emotional distress of loneliness, resentment, guilt and shame is key to maintaining and living a better life.

Valentine’s Day can be a difficult day for singles so I’m sharing a few suggestions that might help:

  • Go out for a long brunch
  • Go dancing or take a class
  • Create a calming space in your home
  • Go someplace in the city you’ve never been
  • Walk in nature
  • Meditate or use a guided meditation
  • Have an unplugged meal
  • Start an herb garden
  • Invest in yourself-take a course
  • Declutter a drawer or room
  • Create a relaxation playlist or download one
  • Intentionally plan an evening of rest
  • Watch your favorite movie
  • Cook your favorite dish
  • Listen to a TED Talk
  • Say No to things that don’t serve you
  • Watch the sunset
  • Visualize your best life-then create it
  • Realize your worth is in God and not your status

During the month of February my self-care like a boss will consist of healthier eating and exercise, fasting, meditation, prayer and play.  I’m going to the theater on Valentine’s Day to see “The Color Purple” and that weekend to see “The Black Panther.”

Betty Friedan said “Aging is not lost youth but a new stage of appointments and strength.” 

No matter what the mirror reflects accept yourself and live your life fearlessly.


Live Well,





  1. I did not know about National Wear Red Day, it is great that you have shared this information through this post. I like the tips you have mentioned for self care, these small things can completely change our life and make us happier.

  2. I was single for near 5 years, and I understand the pain of seeing the (sickening) sweet Valentine’s Day messages on the net… It was somewhat painful, until I realised that standing out to wish everyone Happy Valentine’s Day feels better than trying to hide from the world

  3. Your post is a great idea, giving tips to overcome the social pressure we get out of this day. I grew up in a country where Valentine’s day was literally unknown. now that I live in Europe, there is a bit of commercial promotion of this date, especially flower shops and chocolate ones. But most people generally ignores it. there is no mention of this date in the schools, and very rarely in the media (tv, newspapers) but with internet, the avalanche that comes from the US can be overwhelming! It seems that if you don’t have a loving partner you are excluded of this celebration. So what?

  4. Your list of things to do holds a ton of great suggestions! I’d love to go for a long brunch any day of the week! I’m glad to see you are practicing self care like a boss! It’s often not easy to remember to put ourselves first sometimes!

  5. I totally agree with all these tips some of these I mentioned in my own post. Valentines Day should not ruin your entire evening such very wise words.

  6. This is such a great post. Even 50’s are still important self care and self love. and some of your suggestions are so helpful. Thanks for sharing!!

  7. You made some really great suggestions here for singletons! I like the idea of starting a herb garden or taking a course!

  8. This is great wisdom for women of any age. As a full-time working mom and wife, I often get anxiety with everything that has to “get done” in my household and life. It can get overwhelming and I know this type of stress leads to heart related problems. The American Heart Association produced a video with Elizabeth Banks some years ago called, “Just a Little Heart Attack.” It was an eye opening experience for me as I realized that she was living my life. I’m reminded of this video any time I feel like life is getting out of control. I have to take care of me first or I won’t be any good for my family.

  9. Heart is the most important organ in my body and most people tend to forget to take care of it. It also work non stop for us 24 by 7,every single second. Unlike other organ that could have some rest. You suggestion for single to spend for Valentine day are great list, too many great ideas. Thanks for reminding me again… yes, I agree TED talk is just great – to listen in the early of the morning is a great start!

  10. Selfcare is so important at any age , some of the tips you gave are so easy and I am sure with determination can be followed also. Thank you

  11. I didn’t know about the first matter taking place in February, I think there should be more awareness into that and it’s great that you’re spreading the word. Also, I think your list is amazing for anyone feeling down. I personally like to listen to uplifting TED talks when I’m feeling sad or like a failure, they always do the trick and inspire me to keep going.

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